Sex and Polyamory

Why is sex and polyamory so often equated with being promiscuous? I was texting with a potential date on Tinder today. He was flirting with me and I was enjoying the casual banter. Then he asked me to meet up for some sexy times. (He told me in one of the first sentences that he…

Relationship Philosophies

How Non-monogamy shapes my belief system. As I approach 50 years on this earth, I realize how much my relationship philosophies have changed. In theory, the memoir I am writing (in theory- if I ever worked on it more) is about how I became the woman I am today from my traditional evangelical roots. It’s…

Men and Love

I see a man walking across the parking lot. He is of normal height, and he doesn’t stand out to me as anyone “special.” He’s holding his girlfriend’s hand and laughing. They get to the car, and he pulls her to him in an embrace, still smiling, he kisses her forehead, opens the door, and…

Justifications

Why do we always feel like we have to justify our actions, ideas, and thoughts to other people? I think women do it more than men, but it’s real. Instead of just saying, “No, thank you.” We come up with a whole host of excuses, reasons why we can’t do the thing or go to…

I Am Having Feels

I recently told my monogamous partner that it is normal to have “feels” when your partner meets someone new. Even the most experienced polyamorous people can have some wobbles and stress when they realize their partner is connecting with someone new. Not everyone is filled with compersion the minute they find out about these situations….

Having a Story

We all have a story! ********** The other day, I was talking to a friend and he said something along the lines of “I wish I knew then, what I know now.” He was referring to being more confident in relationships and being more comfortable with flirting and sexual situations. It was a fun chat…

Facing the Facts

Facing the facts about my comet relationship. Today’s post is brought to you by the letter F. I really love that I have written every day this month. I know it’s only the 6th, but I haven’t been this consistent in a long time, and it hasn’t even been too much of a challenge to…

Expectations

We all have expectations. We have the ones that were placed on us and we have the ones we place on ourselves and others. All of these can be confusing, exhausting, and sometimes comforting or helpful at various times and stages of our life. Growing up in a very strict American Evangelical home meant there…